Ever wonder why you have visions of having a better wardrobe, but somehow, those dreams don’t come true?
Sometimes, we tell ourselves untruths about why we can’t look the way we want, and in this episode, I’m covering five of the biggest style lies!
I’ll share what the lies are, what I think you really mean, and what to say to yourself instead.
Style Lie #1: “I can’t wear (fill in the blank)”
When you tell yourself you can’t wear something, you give away your power to an arbitrary list of rules. The truth is, you can wear anything you want. Take back your power, and the responsibility for loving the way you look by telling yourself you choose not to wear things because you don’t feel your best in them.
On the other hand, if you’re telling yourself you “can’t” wear something because a list on the internet told you you couldn’t, and you’ve never tried to wear it to find out, you owe it to yourself to discover what you like, and don’t like–and what you choose to wear, or not wear.
Remember, how you feel in something is more important than following a list of rules.
What to say instead: I choose not to wear (fill in the blank).
Style Lie #2: “What I wear doesn’t matter”
For some women, that’s probably true. But you’re on a site about style, so chances are, that isn’t the case. Women often tell themselves style doesn’t matter, or what they wear doesn’t matter when they don’t know how to create a wardrobe they love, or style has moved off the priority list. They don’t feel they can have style, so they tell themselves it just doesn’t matter, even though it really does.
Style is about so much more than what you wear–it’s how you feel about yourself, your overall energy, and how you show up in the world. Those things absolutely matter.
What to say instead: “How I feel about myself affects my energy, and liking the way I look is a part of that”
Style Lie #3: “I’ll dress better when (fill in the blank)”
So many women believe they’ll have more style when they have a better body, more time, or a bigger bank account. And yes, those things make style easier. But what they don’t do is magically transform you into a person who values style when you hit a random goal
How you feel about yourself and your worthiness doesn’t instantly change when your size, bank account and free time do. All of those things are considerations, but they’re not the reason you don’t care about style now.
If you want to be a person with better style then, start by being a person who values style now.
What to say instead: “I deserve to love the way I look right now, regardless of my situation. When and if it changes, my wardrobe can change too”.
Style Lie #4: “I’m just not good at style. I wasn’t born with an eye for it”.
While it’s true that some people were born with a gift for knowing how to put things together, or how to create unique style, it’s also true that most of us weren’t. But that doesn’t mean you can’t learn if you want to.
When we look at people who are naturally good at style, we have to remember is that yes, maybe they were born with a talent, but they worked very hard, practiced, and made lots of mistakes to get truly great.
You might never become an editor of a fashion magazine (most of us won’t) but you can learn simple tricks, tips, and strategies to create a style you love. Everything in style can be learned, and figured out. Everything.
What to say instead: “I don’t feel good at style yet, but I know I can learn”
Style Lie #5: “I don’t have time to get dressed”
I’ve heard this
hundreds thousands of times in my career, and no one who’s said it to me has been naked. They’ve all been fully dressed. So what do we mean by “I don’t have time to get dressed”?
One thing we mean is that our mornings are busy and stressful, and we don’t have time to create fun, exciting, stylish outfits, so we settle for being not naked.
Other women actually mean that they don’t have the clothes they need to make them look the way they want. They think it’s a time issue, but they could stand there for hours, and not be able to pull something together.
If you’re in the first group, plan your outfit the night before, when you’re not rushing. If you’re in the second group, make time to think about how you want to look, and shop for the clothes that will help you reach that goal.
What to say instead: “How I look is important to me, and worth investing time in”.
If you’ve been telling yourself any of these style tall tales, it’s time to be honest about what you really mean, so you can have the style you’ve always dreamed of. Listen to the full episode below for more information (and a bonus lie!)
Additional Links & Resources from the Episode:
Is it time to figure out how to create Signature Style and learn to Dress Your Body Shape? Maybe you need to get your closet in order. Check out our classes to help you solve your style challenges.
The Growth Mindset Podcast, featuring Brian Biro
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